From my 6 weeks backpacking alone in Hawaii, I’ve learnt a lot of things about myself and about friendships. Whether it be new friendships, old friendships, weird friendships, high school friendships, you name it. So I put together a list of 5 things I’ve learnt from travelling alone and the type of friends I want to surround myself with and hopefully it will have some good insight for your friendship situations your dealing with as well. Okay less of me blabbing, let’s get into it;
1) Like Minded Friends are Major Key
Being friends with like minded people that have the same type of interests is the best. There is something different about the friendships you make when your travelling alone because you meet people that share the same sort of adventurous vibe with you that you just simply wouldn’t find back at home. People at the hostels are open minded, free spirited, and living life the way I want to live my life. And being surrounded by these sort of people really lifted my spirits, it made me happier, made me feel less alone in wanting to venture off into my own path, and I felt a type of connection with people from all over the world which I never would connect in that way with back at home.
2) A “Hey Are You Still Alive?” Message Would Be Nice
You realize who your true friends are when you receive that simple “hey, how’s your trip going?” message. And I’m not saying that a true friend has to message you every single day at every second like a crazy person. But if your travelling alone for awhile, I think it makes sense for a friend to just say hows it going, are you still alive kinda deal. To me it’s a simple gesture that means the world to me. It’s nice to see those messages and to know that their thinking about you while your away. And I would do the same for a friend I really cared about too.
3) Drop the Negative Friends like It’s Hot
You may know a friend that you’ve had since forever but you can have a stronger connection and a real-er friendship (if that’s even a word) with someone you met for a couple weeks. If your in a friendship that is making you feel obligated to be their friends because of the amount of years you’ve known each other for, let me just say that is of no factor on why you should stay friends with that person. Friendship shouldn’t feel like a chore. And it took me a long time to realize that but once you do, you’ll feel a weight lifted off your chest and you’ll feel like a million bucks – seriously. Let go of the people in your life that has been shedding those negative vibes on you, causing you stress, or you simply don’t feel like hanging out with them anymore. There is absolutely nothing wrong with re-evaluating friendships for your own happiness what so ever. The friendships you surround yourself with and the type of people you surround yourself with makes a HUGE difference in your everyday life, so choose your tribe wisely.
4) Don’t Be A Stingy Friend… Or Person.
Real friendships don’t put money first. What I mean by this is the no BYOB type of shit or the what’s mine is mine kind of concepts. For instance, during my travels in Hawaii I was on a mega budget because I wanted to save enough to go to Kauai. And so, I grocery shopped really cheap and would never eat at restaurants let alone take outs. But my hostel friends would always share their food with me without a second thought, would even sometimes offer to pay for me, and would never prioritize how much money they had in their pockets. Even if they had nothing, they gave their everything. And it’s sad to say but I’ve never met these kinds of people in my life. If you didn’t have a beer and someone had a six pack, they would share. If you had nothing to eat, they would feed you. It’s a simple concept of sharing that I don’t see often anymore. Always give more then what you take. I’m sorry but no one likes a stingy friend. If your the stingy friend – stop being stingy.
5) Just Be Real
Real friends support each other… sincerely and genuinely. I’ve never been so proud of my blog until meeting the most supportive friends that actually want to see me exceed and do amazing things with my blog platform. Sometimes back at home, I would feel incredibly insecure about talking about my blog to anybody. When I first started Carrie Project, I didn’t tell a single person about my blog and just started it because I wanted to do it for me – and I still am. What I’m saying is that there are some “friends” out there that say they want to see you do well… but really they don’t. DJ Khaled is right – stay away from they lol! And trust your gut feeling, it’s always right.